Bemis Heights: American River Fortifications

Another exciting exploration at the Saratoga National Historical Park!

We started the day with the intent of hiking by the Hudson River.

After my second visit to the Saratoga Battlefield
I learned about the Park Entrance off of Route 4.
I learned about the Fraser Burial Site Trail.
... but I didn't know the only way to get to the Trailhead is through the Park.

Tour Park Road.
... currently closed until April.

Change of Plans.

We stopped by the Visitor Center.
Used the bathroom.
Becky and Andrew got to look around the little museum in the Visitor Center.
... and then we decided to hike near the Neilson House.

It was Bright.
It was Cold.
it was so cold

The Wind
up at the highest point
of Bemis Heights
where the Neilson House stands
the wind up there
the wind
was
absolutely
brutal.

We didn't stay up at the top too long.

It had been snowing.
That’s what it does this time of year in Upstate New York.
... snow.
The first time I went to the Neilson House
I couldn't even find the Park Road going down towards the American River Fortifications.
... because there was so much snow.

Snow drifts and a little melting made it possible to follow the Park Road.
We did hike through plenty of snow.
... approximately 3.5 miles.

Something I noticed...
The Neilson Farm
Bemis Heights
The American Encampment
... the lay of the land
it was different.
Different from the Freeman Farm.

I remember the Freeman Farm being hilly.
Rolling Hills.
The Neilson Farm...
swept down from the house
down to the bluffs
overlooking
the only road
during the American Revolution
from Montreal to Albany.

We didn't get down to the Hudson River.
I couldn't even see it.
I was disappointed.
... again.

We did get to see hawks!
screeching
soaring
dancing in flight.

We also saw many tracks of animals in the snow.
a funny moment...
we were walking along and I saw strange patterns in the snow.
my brain couldn't put it into a category I recognized!
it was textured
scaly...
I was thinking...
snow snake?
that's impossible!
as I continued to try to figure it out
I noticed...
it was actually the imprint of a Pine Cone
rolling down a slight slope where we stood.
Snow Snake...

Walking along the bluffs of Bemis Heights was pretty amazing.
I was so excited to be outside
that I didn't read any of the plaques
which is just...
really strange for me.
I do believe Nathan read them all.

Hiking back from the American River Fortification
we all agreed it would be best
if we didn't retrace our path down to the bluffs
... but instead
go straight up the hill of the Old Neilson Farm.
Up to the Neilson House.

I stopped several times walking up to the Neilson House.
... taking pictures
... breathing in the beauty and peacefulness

I started back up the hill.
Nathan, Becky, and Andrew were already at the top
... and much to my surprise
They Were Throwing Snowballs At Me!

I must say the snowballs coming towards me
added even more perspective to what it might be like
advancing on a camp.

I've come to really enjoy snow hiking.
I've hiked close to 12 miles in the Saratoga National Historical Park now.
... and I still have quite a ways to hike in the British Encampment.
... by the Hudson River.
I will get there.
I will.

Neilson House.

View from Bemis Heights.

Cannon, crane, and mount...

Cannon.

Neilson House.
The snow makes it difficult to see the American Fortification markers.

Red Tail Hawk soaring.

Just a view I enjoyed.

Nathan, Becky, and Andrew at the Neilson House.

A map of Saratoga National Historical Park.
I got this map from a Ranger at the Visitor Center.

Stillwater, NY - January 10th 2015

Right Where It Belongs

See the animal in his cage that you built
Are you sure what side you're on?
Better not look him too closely in the eye
Are you sure what side of the glass you are on?
See the safety of the life you have built
Everything where it belongs
Feel the hollowness inside of your heart
And it's all
Right where it belongs

What if all the world's inside of your head
Just creations of your own?
Your devils and your gods all the living and the dead
And you're really all alone
You can live in this illusion
You can choose to believe
You keep looking but you can't find the woods
While you’re hiding in the trees
    
What if everything around you
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you used to know
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection
Is that all you want it to be?
What if you could look right through the cracks
Would you find yourself - find yourself afraid to see?

-NIN

Working Through Depression

I'm led to believe

although unexpected events happen in our lives
we are who we are

choices
changes
consequences

all based on how we perceive our surroundings

of course this raises questions about
change
perception...
reality.

I struggle with depression, anxiety, anger...

throwing away clutter in my apartment
I came across a print out I received a couple years ago concerning mental health.
The 10 Fundamental Elements of Recovery

number one stood out

1. Self-direction: Essentially, a person with a mental health condition leads the process of recovery by defining life goals and then designing a unique path toward those goals.

I've recently been reflecting on goals.
during a job interview
I was asked where I saw myself three to five years from now...

I was so taken aback!
how could I possibly answer that question honestly?
I couldn't say a mother.
I couldn't say maybe I'd be dead.
I couldn't say I didn't care.
I couldn't say with confidence that I had ANY goals...

depression is difficult to explain to another soul if they have never been there.
to be perfectly honest
I have trouble with my ADLs (activities of daily living)
every day tasks are often overwhelming for me.
as hard as that is to admit...
it is true.

I feel like the last two years have been a slap in my face!
I'd thought...
I'd come to terms with all the things
I'd never have.
I'd never do.
I thought I was happy.

panic sneaks up
out of nowhere at times

lately I've felt
my existence has no meaning
no hope
no purpose
it's frustrating
it's sad

I set daily goals.
walking
blogging
I make ADL lists.
shower
eat...

some uncontrollable events
contribute to my dismay
but the most prevalent factor?
I've spent the better part
of the last five months
ALONE.

it's recently occurred to me
that even when I thought I was happy
I had the same feelings
of depression, anxiety, and anger.
nothing has changed.

I look back and see the only difference is DISTRACTION.
just enough non-stop...

I suppose if I'm being honest...
 in the past I didn't recognize my
compulsive behavior
destructive behavior
obsessive behavior
lack of coping skills
lack of self esteem
negative thinking
 or understand my
high energy is caused by high anxiety
need to achieve is a need for acceptance

I've gained access to tools to better learn how to move forward in my life.
I am just experiencing a hiccup right now.

THE JOB INTERVIEW
putting effort into my appearance
getting out of the house
answering questions

I hate admitting that I NEED human contact.
for the most part I can do without.

truth?
it was so good to be able to
engage in conversation
make eye contact
and talk about myself.

when I left the interview I felt good.
after much thought.
I've decided this feel good feeling wasn't because I thought I got the job.
it was because I spoke kindly about myself.

when a depressed person is in a negative thought pattern
it is hard to step outside of the thought process
even when we recognize what is happening.

it is easy to say unkind things
about myself
to myself
by myself

I had to point out my strengths and it gave me time away from my weaknesses.

Hopeful Alicen.

THE JOB INTERVIEW
naturally, it reminded me of college.

Simmons College and self-reflection.

only by truly knowing
who “you” are
your strengths
your weaknesses
and really looking within
can you be a GREAT leader.

I feel fortunate
to have had the opportunity
to have a face-to-face interview
... because in person
... sharing who I am
I shine like a star!

I am happy I got the job.

I still feel empty.
I still feel spiteful.
I still fear the future.
I still don't know where I'll be three years from now...
but honestly...
does anyone?

Wilkinson National Recreational Trail

Since my first visit to the Saratoga National Historical Park

I've wanted to hike the Wilkinson Trail.

The Wilkinson National Recreational Trail is a 4.2 mile "lasso" path.

It's located in the northern part of the Saratoga Battlefield.

The Liaison Trail (a shorter hike)

-from Breymann Redoubt

-to Balcarres Redoubt

excludes a good portion of the Wilkinson Trail (two miles)

but it does take you to the Freeman Farm. 

I wanted to do the whole trail.

I had somehow got the impression 

if I did the whole hike...

I would get to see the Hudson River.

I was wrong...

but this gives me another opportunity to explore the park farther.

Saratoga Battlefield.

My first hike of the New Year! 

I was so excited to return to the Saratoga Battlefield with Nathan.

It was cold out...

but not unbearable.

Snow wasn't falling... 

and the wind was mostly calm.

We knew hiking the whole length of the trail would take a couple hours.

So we got out of the house early.

The days are getting longer...

but darkness still arrives faster than one expects.

Gently rolling hills. 

Sporadic forests.

Expansive fields.

Nathan and I both enjoyed the absence of people.

(the best thing about hiking off season)

When we did see other humans they were near the cannons and memorials.
I do not believe most people hike the whole Wilkinson Trail.

Cannon.

As we walked...

we of course talked about the landscape.

Its contribution to how the battles were fought.

We talked about what it might be like to be a part of the war...

the quality of weapons

the quality of life

the real idea of the blood that was shed 

... horrifying.

The Freeman Farm 

"the battlefield" 

When Nathan and I came upon the area 

where the Freeman farmhouse once stood 

I saw cannons everywhere.

Immediately I knew this was the area! 

The top of the snowy field

with the plaques

and the cannons...

The place I couldn't reach my first visit to the park.

... due to snow.

I started looking up 

to see if I could make out 

the lookout where I first saw 

the Freeman Farm.

I got so excited.

I saw the marvelous trees!!! 

Even from down on the battlefield the trees stood out.

The battlefield with no snow was surprisingly different.

I think Nathan and I were in need of a long walk.

He stopped and read the plaques.

He explained things to me about the Revolutionary War.

His enthusiasm was refreshing.

Looking down a ravine from the trail.

I'm not sure if it's the time of year...

but in the wooded areas...

I had the impression... 

I would get lost if I was by myself.

... directionally challenged.

Everywhere I looked was deceptively similar.

Lucky for me the trail is very well marked.

I recommend getting a Wilkinson Trail map available at the Visitor Center. 

The Wilkinson Trail brochure is great to have during the hike around the British Encampment. 

It has a list of interpretive stations

-A through N

explaining events of the Battle of Saratoga.

I enjoyed the interpretive stations.

During a walk that’s a little over 4 miles it’s nice to stop. 

look around...

and gain knowledge of the history beneath one's feet.

"Bloody Knoll" at Balcarres Redoubt.

Not really mentioned on the internet.

Nothing noting its location in my Wilkinson Trail brochure.

Yet I believe I read, the knoll is where the most casualties in the battle occurred.

I kind of wish I had done it now...

but I didn't take pictures.

After collecting information from the Visitor Center on my first visit
brochures...
maps...
I thought it would be easy to find information about Wilkinson National Recreational Trail on the internet.

There are lots of maps to be found.
Maps of where the trail is.
Maps of how to get there.
but no real information about hiking the trail itself.
I do own a book with detailed information about the hike.
I also have a map of the trail that I got from the Park Ranger...
but even the National Park Service website didn't have Wilkinson Trail information.

Lots of historical information on the battle...
but not much about the path through history.

I do highly recommend going to the Visitor Center before exploring.

They have excellent maps and historical information.

A timeline museum.

A battle tactic map with lights showing movements of troops.

Cannons.

And a public restroom.

Nathan and I ended up walking 5 miles.

We had an excellent time exploring the British Encampment.

We were out on the trail for about 2 1/2  hours.

We went into the Visitor Center briefly after we finished walking.

I thought Nathan might enjoy a quick look at the weapons.

Just as we left the Visitors Center...

it started snowing.

Behind the Visitor Center heading towards the Wilkinson Trailhead.
Overlooking Saratoga Battlefield.

Cannon at Balcarres Redoubt.
Many cannons are displayed in this area.

Cannon at Breymann Redoubt.

Flax was farmed on this field back in 1777.

Path used by the British Army.

Hessian soldier route.

The Hessian soldiers advancing would have crossed a bridge here.

Nathan on the path where the Hessian soldiers advanced.

Battlefield view from British fortifications.
The Freeman Farm. 

One last look.
Back at the Visitor Center.

Brochure I got from the Visitor Center.

Wilkinson Trail map in the brochure.

Hiking in New York: A Guide to the State's Best Hiking Adventures

Stillwater, NY - January 3rd 2015